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It is said that most people have no more than 30 friends at any given time, and 400 over the whole
of their lives. However, on social networking sites, most users have about 1 50 friends. If these
numbers are correct, then friendship means different things in different situations.
One of the reasons for having more online friends than real friends at a certain point in time is
that online friendships do not require much time and energy: it is easy to accept friendships and
keep them forever. Another possibility is that it is difficult to say 'no' when somebody asks us
to be their friend online, even if we feel we don't really know them. The fact that they ask us
suggests that they do consider us a friend, which is a nice feeling. Alternatively, they may be
'collectors' of online friends and just want to use us to get a higher number of friends and appear
to be popular.
Online friendships are quite easy, but in the real world decisions about friendships are harder to
make. There are no rules about friendship. There are no guidelines about how to make friends, how
to keep friendships going, and how to finish friendships if we want to move on. People have very
different opinions about this: some people would die for their friends and they value them more
than family. Others say that friends are temporary, only there to help each other until they are no
longer needed. If people with such different views become friends, this can lead to problems.
Because of these different definitions of friendship, it is easy to be unhappy about our friendships.
We may want them to be deeper or closer, or we may want to have more friends in our lives.
Sometimes we simply do not have the time to develop our friendships, or we fear we have left it
too late in life to start. If we move to another country or city, we have to find ways to make new
friends again.
This dissatisfaction shows us how important friendships are for most of us. We should not think
that it could be too late to build friendships. We also need to understand that the need to be around
other people is one that is shared by many. Therefore, we should not be too frightened about
starting to talk to people who in the future may become our friends: it is likely that they too would
like to get closer to us. Remember what people say: strangers are friends we have not met yet.
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